Dream Toilets

This morning I had a dream and I thought I would share it to sort of walk-through my interpretative process.
Here are my notes:

Very thick dream. Had to do with my child-hood home. The dream opened in the Wal-mart parking lot. I went into a sort of resticted area / “employees only” type zone and found behind it a sort of big hallway tunnel leading upward to the back side of Wal-mart. It felt a bit like a cave though it wasn’t a cave. It just had that feel to it.  On the other side I found sort of an employee “housey” type area that had a little laptop and a joystick and some other things in a room. It felt like a miniature “neighborhood” within Wal-mart – small houses built inside Wal-mart. I wanted to take the laptop because it was small and would be excellent on physical security testing jobs, but decided not to. It was called “Psy”. I kept trying to rationalize taking it, but decided against doing so. I came up with some excuse that Wal-mart had plenty in profits and they weren’t even using it – it was just leftovers from some Christmas party that the employees had. The room had a feel of yesterday to it. As though no-one from Wal-mart even knew about this place, but it had been used in a time past. I think that is why I kept trying to rationalize taking a laptop that wasn’t mine.

I was then riding in the back seat of a truck with 2 rough individuals and I think got away from them. I aas then lead back to this place behind Wal-mart and saw Deacon G’s (someone I looked up to in my youth in the Catholic Church in my hometown) having his birthday being celebrated in front of a lot of people. I then went on a little bit further there was some lady reporter who was excited about going to the house of my childhood. I went there and my mom had prepared some sort of display. My child-hood house served as a place of business and a home. My dad and mom ran a used car business together.  She had placed car covers over all the cars on the car lot and it looked “nice”.

Went inside my old house and it was nice inside. I would describe it as “plush”. There were people with me. We were there for some sort of celebration, but I wasn’t sure what when I awoke. I went into the back of the house and there was one guy who came with me though I can’t remember who.  I saw that the present owner of my old house wasn’t there, but he lived like a pig – it was very messy. I’ve often wondered about the owner of my childhood home and have had multiple dreams about this house and the owner. There was stuff everywhere – old toothpaste bottles, dusty mirrors, etc. I looked into the bathroom and saw two floaters in the toilet and had sort of brown stuff blended into the water headed down. It was gross. I told the other guy, let’s get out of here man – we don’t need to be getting into this guy’s stuff.  So we got out and I woke up a short time later.

When I awoke, I figured I might as well try to interpret the dream so first I went back and forth through it in my head and then dictated it to my iPhone.

I thought about the message of the dream and noted that there was a mess in my old house and that there was another presence in the back of my childhood house that was living there and not flushing the toilets.  I started thinking about this as perhaps some nasty stuff in my childhood that I had not dealt with – perhaps a piece of me forgotten back there. A man who was not there, though his presence felt in my old house – living behind the curtain. Perhaps this points to a fragment or something trapped back there.

This brought up an associative memory as I was interpreting. When I was a kid, my dad used to drive a tractor trailer and would leave for extended periods. I used to be so excited when he would come back, but was sad to see him leave, or he would not be there because he was out working. I tend to have a fear of abandonment, so I think this may be where it initially came from and may explain the situation with my extranged wife. That is, why my soul / me would choose someone who would abandon me. I imagine that idea is that I needed to confront this fear.

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